New Beginnings And All That Sentimental Crap

What better way to end the year for two blogger-friends still in their pajamas on New Year’s Eve, eagerly awaiting an evening of junk food and romantic comedies, than to share with you some soppy sentiments of our past year together. Here are a few snippets of our 2013, we hope it was as magical for you as it was for us.

Nazreen

2013 has been an eventful year, to say the least. I completed my undergrad degree (without shaming myself) from Malaysia, Travelled across the globe, to grey ol' London, to do my Masters in a subject I’d never seen myself doing, got to be room mates with one of my closest friends, AND managed to get a job! Looking back now brings up mixed emotions. No matter how much I try, I can't get myself to write a coherent reflection of 2013.  So here are spurts of the year that was: 

2013 was the year of losing faith in myself and working hard to reclaim it. It was marred with huge periods of self-doubt and fear of losing. Starting with my final year project. Looking back, I don’t know how I managed to hand in a 12,000 word project without going crazy (Well, I did go a little mental). Handing in the project was one of the most fulfilling things I've ever done. It was a reminder for myself that I can do anything I set my mind on, if I put my complete trust in God and give it my best shot. Alhamdulillah.

2013 was the year of exciting beginnings. I will remember this year as the one where I dived into something so new that it unsettled me to the core. Starting a degree in a new subject (in a new place) is a little scary, especially if you aren't sure about the choice you made. But it was also the year that I learned to stop trying to control every aspect of my life and make peace with the choices I have made so far. It has been a bumpy ride with lots of twists and turns. And yet, it has only made me stronger AND earned me a few friends in the process!

2013 was the year I got my first job. Had a REAL interview,held my breath, bit my nails and made it through! It’s the year I began trusting myself to stand on my own. Yes, living on your own is tough but it’s equally exhilarating! I am a little high on this freedom, hope it never wears down!

2013 was the year I finally realized how grateful I should be (and am) for my family- My parents and brothers. I have been my daddy’s little girl and my brothers’ annoying elder sister. This year, found out that I have a soul sister too- My mother. My parents are probably the first ones who will read this post. So let me be sentimental for a minute and let this out: You guys are the best gift Allah has given me. With every atom in my body I thank you for being the amazing people you are. Thank you for believing in me. For enabling me to find my own feet. Nothing I say or do can even come close to repaying you, So I will spend the rest of my life trying to be the daughter you two deserve. I love you.

Finally, 2013 taught me to cope with loss. It showed me that life takes its own course no matter how badly you want to stay in that moment. I lost my uncle a few weeks back and still haven’t come to terms with it. What it has led to, though, is a greater appreciation for the people I have in my life right now. Life has led me to so many different places and brought in so many wonderful people in the course. I am thankful to God for each one of them. For those reading this, I don’t know what role I play(ed?) in your life, but you have been kind enough to let me in. So, Thank you! Meanwhile, I hope I was able to bring in some goodness, a little bit of laughter and maybe a dash of joy into your life! I don’t know how long I’ll be around (before I die or you kick me out), but while I am here, I hope that at some point I have been the reason behind your smile.

Now as we leave behind this year and step into a new one, let us take a moment out, from all our resolutions and celebrations, to be grateful for everything gained and lost. As the wearied 2013 slips out of the window and we wait with bated breath to let the new year in, let's pause to give the past its due in making us who we are. For bringing us to this moment. Now. 
Here's to a more exciting year filled with love, joy and laughter! 

Chalani

Keeping with the tradition of reflecting back on the past year, I cannot deny that 2013 has been life changing. But reflecting back for me doesn’t necessarily take me back to the beginning of this year, but rather three years ago, when I first entered university and this journey actually started. I was nineteen, naïve and new. And in the blink of an eye, here I am in 2013. 


I am so thankful to all the things I was able to see this year. I’ve had to say goodbye to Malaysia which I miss deeply- to speak of homesickness now is not just to speak of Sri Lanka, but Malaysia as well. I graduated with all my best friends and embarked on a new journey in LSE which was a dream come true, and here I will continue to cherish the wonderful memories and experiences I have been given. I am so blessed to have been amongst so many wonderful people in the past year who have taught me so many lessons about love, ambition and forgiveness. Your life is only as good as the people you are with, and I am thankful to all of you that have been a part of my life this year, especially my parents and my friends, both old and new. 

One thing that I have been accepting lately is that real life happens in-between the big plans we make. Big plans like at the end of next year I will have my first job, at the end of next month I will have a dissertation topic, at the end of this day I will have a carefully edited article on my blog. But what about right now, tomorrow at 3 o’clock, the middle of next week, moments we don’t plan out to be the way we want them to be; these are the times we must not forget to appreciate. It is quite evident to me and those close to me that I often do not live in the moment, but find happiness in hoping for the future. This is something I will strive to change as the years go by, as I try not to believe too much in the certainty of tomorrow. Quite recently a friend of mine posted on Facebook something that has stuck with me; she misses the time when we could have the time of our lives, and not need a picture to prove it. If there is one thing I could wish for next year, is that I have such moments. Moments of unexpected joy that has not been planned or hoped for, moments of beauty that I can close my eyes and imprint in my memory, something I can tell myself, I will never forget this, THIS is my life, right now. 

At the end of 2012 I would never have dreamed that I would be where I am now. This is why I am so glad to be unaware of what 2014 will bring. Uncertainty and the anxiety of uncertainty is a good thing, it’s what makes me keep on trying. As Nazreen said to me last night, why not celebrate the old year as much as we celebrate the new year? So that is exactly what I will do, celebrate today and dream of tomorrow.
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